Early and in a hurry = FAIL

Dammit, I got busted this morning for speeding.  The cop nailed me out of a turn and at the bottom of a little hill.  Physics, you betrayed me, you evil bitch!  191 Loonies and 3 demerit points...I know what my workday will pay for.

My first speeding ticket since I started driving...that's 24 years and change, kids.  I even told the officer that he had just popped my cherry.  Oh man!, the look on his face, priceless!!!

Moving Right Along; part II

I noticed that two of my three followers are no more.  Well, I'm not surprised since I've stopped all matter of critical thinking and ranting to concentrate on renovations.  After I received my severance package, I decided to take a 6-7 month sabbatical to finish the house (it's far from done and I'm not about to call it a home just yet). 

I apologize to them and hope that they check-in sometime soon.  I think it's time for me to add my voice to the InterWeb's Cacophony again and I'll get back to it but first, I need to find a real job!!

As some of you might know, in June 2010, my work contract wasn't renewed.  I basically lost my job due to a corporate takeover and subsequent restructuring of the company 'assets'. I understand that the new admin pukes were tasked with the reduction of management redundancies (getting rid of duplicate employees).  What I don't agree with is the lies that they regurgitated in our general direction to appease us.

------ We interrupt for a side note, two years in the making ------  

It seems that we Canadians have ensconced ourselves behind the Corporate American Business Model, much to my chagrin.  Overtake a company,  merge and get rid of the help to allow the  Board of Directors & the Shareholders to make more money, faster. 

In these Troubled Times, they're hoping that the company or the economy doesn't fold.  Mind you, if that happens, they'll simply fly in, sit and look pretty in front of Congress, stroke a few Politicians then get the Bailout they need for their triumphant return to Vegas.  Of course, after they've washed off the lube they used on us, they'll have to vote themselves a raise...contractual obligations, you understand.

It's not like that money was needed to feed, clothe, shelter and educate a Nation, nah...but they managed to steal from the poor, just sayin'.

We don't really function the way our Southern neighbours do but we have some tendencies.  I'd like to believe that we can think for ourselves and that we can do the Right Thing when called upon.  Wishful thinking? of course it is but even as I am the CEA (Chief Exec. Angry) of 2FatDads, I'm allowed a little optimism to work with.

------ Now back to the program, after a brief travel in time ------

I won't say that the new company, by way of the Toronto Head Office, was biased in any way, shape or form when deciding that Montreal was gonna get the shaft, nope!  I won't say that the board of director had already decided our office's fate long before the takeover announcement, nope!  

Oh but wait, I can...it's not hearsay!

They actually said this to me: "We don't know what it is that you do here, so can you HELP us that we may continue the transition."  Wait...what?  How can you give my job away to some twat in T.O. when you don't even know what I've been doing here for the last five years!!!  Seems that my position is somewhat unique and that I don't have a replacement at the Head Office, so why do I have to go...?

...because this is management redundancies, Newspeak for Bullshit.

Notes.

I'm writing this now because I no longer have any colleagues left in that bloody place.  They've all been transitioned and have simply left for better pastures.  This way, if any of those Admin Fucktards start to huff and puff, nobody else can be a target but me.  It's also strangely cathartic.  I didn't think it was so present in the *back* of my mind.

I've since found out that the shareholders are, wait for it, Americans...figures, doesn't it!  Stupid is as stupid does, they've also recently sacked the new CEO & CIO because of lackluster performances (money wasn't coming fast enough, I guess!).  Karma's a real bitch, huh!  

Moving right along...

Just paid my hosting fees and realized it was one year later so....

Hello World, again.  I finished my hiatus and it's time I get back on track. 

The first Coulronaut in Space.

Coulronaut: (I just made that up.) From the greek Koulon, meaning limb and Nautes meaning sailor. Derived from Coulrophobia - fear of clowns.

I've had "exchanges of opinions' with a few people over this, so I'll relate. As you know by now, Guy Laliberté was blasted into orbit yesterday under the infamous Space Tourist "Program". By forking over 35 million dollars, one can book a flight on the Soyuz spacecraft, dock with the ISS and pretend to be an astronaut for several days. Some Apologist blatantly stated that my envy of his success and hatred of the rich hindered my thought processes...Bitch, please. My feelings on this are very direct and visceral; unless you are a trained professional, you have no business being there.

Am I envious...yeah, I'd like to have a little more money...really, who wouldn't! What hatred? I don't hate the man, I don't even know him! For the record, I'm not bitching at a wealthy Canadian entrepreneur...we live in a Capitalist Society, I expect them to be around! If i'd had more business savvy, I could've been one of them! He created a billion dollar industry by re-vamping an age old entertainment. Give credit where credit is due and this one's grand!

My thought processes are clear enough, thank you, that I understand what a business/employment/marketing opportunity is. Hundred of thousands of people have worked for Cirque and received payment in one form or another, even I. The organization can bolster that they have created employment in impoverished countries and what not...but that alone doesn't justify anything. He's a philanthropist whose foundation strives to bring potable water to everyone. He'll use his space-time reminding us water is Life and must be shared by all or something to that effect. That's fine too but we should learn not to waste it in the first place and that problem could almost fix itself. How much of that Blue Gold do you think went up in smoke with this 'mission'? Mind you, as a Cynic and a Realist, I believe everything in the world is outta whack but allowed to functions that way! I see the good in things but mostly the bad that's intrinsically linked to it.

The problems I have with the whole Space tourism issue are many fold. Does an individual have the right, by paying for his seat, to be called an astronaut? No, he doesn't. My analogy was this. Having the money, I could, in theory, pay for a spot on the Canadiens roster, get a few periods of ice time then call myself a professional hockey player. I would need to train hard, Hell, I can't even skate! But damn, I have money therefore I can make the rules. Right. Sidney Crosby would send over his Timbits li'l leaguers with orders to skate up and down my ass before he'd hear me call myself a Pro. The different space agencies call them Spaceflight Participants but I'm sure they're called worse things, behind closed doors! I have more respect for the kids who dream of becoming astronauts. They will study, work and train more than any of us ever will. Should they be accepted within the ranks of the Astronaut Corps, they will have EARNED their place, not PAID for it.

Is it ethical, to satisfy the egotistical whims of a mil/billionaire simply because Space Exploration (as a whole) is strapped for cash? Nope, not in the least. Again, I analogized. Lets pretend that Montreal is in dire need of funds and rents out a firehouse a week at a time. Since the pretend me always wanted to be a fireman. I'll simply write a check, pick out a station and play fireman with the real heroes for awhile. After my time is up, I'll salute everybody, go home a hero to many, save the naysayers. Sure, the city has cash in its coffers and I satisfied my ego for time. But what if my actions or lack thereof, cause an accident with injuries...or worse, loss of lives? What then? Everybody who was in favor of this would jump on the "Lynch Him!" hypocrite bandwagon and cast the first stone. I know, I know, most of you are saying: "Dude! come on, stop being so negative, what could possibly go wrong?" Well, lets see...what can go wrong in the most inhospitable environment known to Man...I guess you have a point there, after all, he is wearing a protective clown nose. That should stop micro-meteorites cold!

As much as NASA downplays this, they're happy that people are willing participants in this type of market. Sure, they'll never admit it but they indirectly benefit from this. The Shuttle fleet will be mothballed next year and eventually replaced by the Orion Spacecraft. (that, in itself, is another big story) In the mean time, they'll need Soyuz to continue servicing the ISS. Those millions can only help with that since A: the Russian agency is low on funds and B: that's less money the Yanks have to dish out. Well, it works on paper...reality is probably far, far different.

Upon return, his PR machine will go into overdrive. He will be on every bloody newspaper and magazine this country can print. Exclusive 1 on 1 radio and TV appearances for the next six months then he'll write a book on his experience - (I'm calling it now...you know this is gonna happen within a year, year and half). He will be deified by the media as a Man with a Vision...but what vision is that, exactly? He set up 100 million dollars on 25 years for his foundation (Charity, the old tax haven standby). We know he has cash and can do what he wants with it, that's not the debate. His foundation is a noble cause, I agree. It is appalling and inhuman that in the 21st century, entire countries have no access to drinking water. Every living being, by birth, has the Right of Life. There are many other clean water/air/soil foundations out there...this one is no different. Until we breed out cruelty and apathy from our gene pool, it, too, is doomed to fail.

I have no ill wishes towards the man. This trip will be the Apex of his Life...but not mine. I refuse to have it shoved down my throat and I refuse to acknowledge greatness where none exists. The furor will die down one day...but not soon enough.

Hump day confusion.

Mmph, it seems that my 'cat' accidentally hit the publish button and posted a whollata nothin' (see previous). The only thing that clued me in was a comment from Schultzter...at least someone is paying attention. Whoa, a few more minutes and the 5-0 would've knocked down my office door! Thanks for warning a brotha!

Reminds me that I'm a lil' late on current events....must fix, soon.

Product packaging: Fail.

Unfortunately, the bottom of the pic was cropped by the cellcam...you could read "New Look" in the purple triangle. Now, if this is the 'Improved' package and it's this bad, can't imagine what the previous one looked like!

Parking: You're doing it wrong.

This is what happens in the Timmies parking lot, at 7 o'clock in the morning. This retard simply drove up, parked and stumbled off to get his Java fix. Can you also see the other truck behind this one? You can barely make out the tip of the cab through the driver's side window. All counted, they used up 8 parking lanes...at the busiest time of the day. They say douchebags are just an Internet meme...no, they're real.

John Hughes, In Memoriam.

We, born in the early 70's and coming of age in the 80's, have lost a part of the cinematic influence which defined us. John Hughes, director of ubiquitous 80's styled teenage movies such as The Breakfast Club (TBC) and Ferris Bueller's Day Off, died suddenly in New York, he was 59 years old.

I'm smack in that age where I directly understood what M. Hughes conveyed to us, the young moviegoers. I was in high school when TBC came out. While not a revelation insofar that the film did not change my Life, it nevertheless opened my eyes a bit more to the system of cliques and social networks prevalent around me at school. We had different tastes, morals, motives and personalities. Our monetary structure also differed; a bunch were well off, the others not so. Some worked and others were pampered and spoiled but we all had one thing in common; Adolescence.

TBC made me realize that High School Life was simply a Rite of Passage; an existential threshold that would ultimately lead us towards Adulthood. While sounding atrociously cliché, the reality is just that. During those few years, a person of supposed sound mind and body will go through the most rigorous mental, physical and emotional training ever imagined; puberty.

Sexual awakenings, hormonal flooding, angst, frustration, pleasure, pain, morphological changes, psychological mappings, doubt, fear, anger and everything in between. Throw in the stress of academic studies and sheer terror of your own bodily alienation, we needed to find safety, fast, lest we'd lose our minds...but where can you turn? For five or six years, everything you go through is also shared by hundreds of kids and you all meet at the same place, everyday. Therefore, the only logical and natural outcome will be the banding of individuals who share common interests.

They were the Famiglia, the security blanket and the only thing that kept us grounded. By sharing a common bond and experiencing together the best and worst that Life had to offer, we became who we are today. It molded our personalities, changed our thoughts and defined who we would become, as individuals. We lived vicariously through everybody around us and picked up the clues and know-how for most situation we would later face as adults.

M. Hughes tried to convey that very reality. He also gave importance to the individual within a social network. A person had feelings and desires...the clique was only an entity, a shelter. One should grow within his peer group but had to learn the fact that the other groups are experiencing the same things. Once you understood that, then as an individual, it wouldn't matter what the other guy thought of you. Be yourself and do what your heart desires and don't give a damn what they think. After all, you only had to tell yourself that they were as fucked up as you!

To quote Ferris Bueller: "A person should not believe in an Ism, he should believe in himself."

That's what I took from him.

John Hughes. (1950-2009)
Resquiescat In Pace.

Guess who's coming back to Town.

This just in. The F1 Circus will be back in Montreal in 2010. Now, I'm just waiting for the fine print to follow....stay tuned.

Note: if the photographer was told to get gratuitous beaver shots...he screwed up, that's a groundhog!

http://en.f1-live.com/f1/en/headlines/news/detail/090804152843.shtml